Robert Anton Gollwitzer

Seelsorger. Berater. Aktivist. - Politisch. Katholisch. Leidenschaftlich.

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So what about "Safer Sex"? - written from a homosexual perspective

Posted on November 6, 2021 at 6:55 AM

So what about "Safer Sex"? What' wrong with it?

"Safer Sex" usually means various protective measures so you can have sex without any danger for your health - for instance through sexually transmitted infections (STI). Examples could be condoms, Prep (taking pills before sex) or protection through HIV-medication. These measures are technical and/or medical things that are per se neither good or bad.

Sometimes the argument that this furthers "immoral behavior" is being said to be primarily used by this "fundamental Christians" in the USA. So what about it?

This argument might be seen as beside the point as it talks about a personal code of moral standards which has nothing to do with one's physical health. Or has it?

I am not a doctor so I can only talk about my personal experience of 20 plus years in the gay scene, having hat multiple partners and lots of - also extreme - sex.

These measures and pills certainly further sexual practices and/or acts that might not have happened without. To deny that would probably be very naive. Again - this also looks like it is neither good nor bad and most certainly in some people's eyes nobody's business.

"Safe Sex" has always been promoted, yet the effect was probably not as some might have hoped. Why? I am going to be very open: Do you know the saying "A stiff dick doesn't have a conscience"? I can only subscribe to that wholeheartedly. I have witnessed that myself so many times - people not caring at all about safety once they were horny. Add to that "Chemsex" (using illegal drugs like meth in order to enhance the sexual pleasure and the orgasm) or "just" alcohol and you get an explosive mix that lowers the barrier of protective measures a lot. All those infections with STI don't come from nowhere - with MSM (men having sex with men) having a relatively huge percentage of the overall infections.

"Safe Sex" might further the willingness to do whatever you want to do sexually. Either you do practice "Safe Sex" and think nothing can ever happen then - or you don't care at all and/or hope that the others do protect themselves at least. Even if not, you might believe there is good medication nowadays.

Irresponsibility and neglicence though keep the numbers of infected people high - and this is not just your own business. All of society has to pay for your decisions then - for example by the high medical costs that need to be covered sometimes over a long period of time by the health insurance companies.

Another point is the emotional side and mental health as a whole. Looking back at my long experience I can only warn you: it is very naive to believe that yielding to any and every impulse to have sex in whatever way and form will not have any consequences for you in that area. I have watched too many people - including myself - over the years to think this has done nothing with their mental health. As to myself: At the end of a 20 year-period I looked at myself and could not believe what had become of me - morally, mentally, physically - in many areas of my life. This is why I left this kind of life.

Finally - even if some people deny it - there is the spiritual aspect. This is one of those things that separates human beings from animals - we (at least most of us) believe in a world beyond what we can perceive with our five senses. I have experienced and heard from many others devastating consequences in that field over the years.

Do not buy arguments that sound logical, simple and clear at first but have a bitter aftertaste. Use your common sense. God has given it to us for a reason.

Categories: Homosexualitaet, Psychische Gesundheit, Ehe & Familie